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I auto-post all of the time. Mostly so I can second guess myself and not publish anything that actually required thought or shares anything personal about my life.

Talk about Rob's diabetes online? Of course not. Or about what it is like to be an instant grandmother? Hell no!

I think my blog readers are lucky I actually announced I got married because it really isn't easy for me to be so open anymore.

You are brave to (a) revisit the notebooks and (b) post some of the entries. I never look back on mine... well, never is too definitive, actually. Once I went through and read the first and last page of each, but I can't go back into the trenches of them, the meat in the middle. And I was not even half as prolific as you were (are?). The one time I did go back and peek, I came away not liking myself very much... really, really not liking "her". I even thought to myself that -- listening to all the whining, page after page of it, volume after volume -- I/she deserved what she got. That's not a good feeling at all, not wanting to protect the child in oneself.

I do find it interesting that you have gaps in the chronology also, particularly during the college years. I also have gaps there. The stories just stop, but there are pages of one-word, two-word, maybe half-a-sentence, line after line of them. I was sure at the time that I'd never be able to forget what those placeholders meant, that one day I'd go back and fill them in with all the gory details. Now, I just stare at them puzzled, as if a stranger left me cryptic notes. I have no idea what I meant to say, let alone what actually happened back then, but it probably wasn't Earth-shattering.

Satia, I'd love to hear what it's like to be an instant grandmother. Can I post it here, if not on your blog?

And Kirsten, I don't like the Old Me in a lot of my journals either. It's pretty awful. I definitely don't want people reading them, knowing how petty, boring, and self-involved they are/I am.

Oh dear, you mean I'd have to *gulp* write out my feelings?

Hmmm . . . let's see what comes up. I'll shoot you a little something asap.

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