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I'm trying to remember myself at 24. Mother of a 4 yr old and twin two year olds. Home all the time. Surrounding by kid powered chaos. Everyone potty trained and weaned. My mornings spent reading aloud from whatever book was handy or brought to me. My afternoons spent hoping all three would take a nap at the same damn time for once, thank you very much!

My life is so boring by comparison.

HEY.... good one.... i can i.d.... the kid in the restaurant... just another event to validate my belief that most humans (particularly amerikan ones) are just selfish, inconsiderate cattle on two legs, who don't deserve the beautiful planet we have commandeered stewardship over...as far as blown opportunities in the days of youth (ah, sounds so romantic..)... i have long accepted the reality that given my propensity to abuse myself, had i achieved the type of success i would like to think i've always deserved back when i was 24, or even 34, for that matter.... i definitely would've killed myself in patterns of excess that i have come just as close to with NO success.... so, i can only IMAGINE what i would have done with a WHOLE lotta money and resources.... i mean, shit... i've been clinically dead several times as it is... i can't fathom that i would have survived fame and fortune at those times of my life....so, yes... as corny as it sounds.... yes, i DO believe everything DOES happen for a reason...

.....and, that SUCCESS thing..(?) well, ahem, i think i'm about ready for my closeup....


You have lived, woman. At 24 I was in grad school, we were building a house in the suburbs (!!), I was married and we were madly in love but making a lot of mistakes, I was a teacher to teenagers who were pregnant and parenting and I was so overwhelmed and useless to them, I thought I knew so much, and yeah...I had a body that I didn't appreciate, that I abused with endless hours of running and starving and yeah, I was 24.

You are one amazing writer, but you already knew that :)

PS Note to self: If/when we finally get the kiddos, always ALWAYS take them out of public places if one starts barfing :)

You're more beautiful now than when I first met you, and you were beautiful then. NOT THAT IT MATTERS. You're beautiful inside too.

*RAGE!!!!!!* I has it too.

Hey, I'm talking here.

It precisely pieces like this one that keep me from even attempting to publish myself. You are so stratospherically brilliant!


Take 2:
Making the right decisions at twenty-four guarantees nada. You can carpe all the right diems still feel like the only one who doesn't have the top-secret super-deluxe decoder ring.
Do you remember those toy soldiers kids from childhood? They had platforms to make them stand up. We have metaphoric platforms, built first from relationships with our primary caregivers. Those of us who don't have "good enough mothers" early in life have smaller, weaker devices to steady us. We can work hard to expand and strengthen our platforms so they are virtually indistinguishable from sturdier foundations, but underneath, our equalizers are a bit more vulnerable to being upended since our basic foundations are more tenuous. We have learned to balance on one leg with a sprained ankle leading sometimes leading us to be funnier, more creative and adeptly resourceful. Sometimes we just need a reminder that our square strength doesn't have to look like we assume all the other round pegs fit perfectly into their round slots. The grass is rarely greener...

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