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I was going to finish reading this, but then suddenly CABS ARE HEAYGHH!

1. Are you wearing a sports bra?
2 Is that Melissa Roth?

Yes it is. And boy does this pic bring the (fractured) memories flooding back.

I think if we're lucky, we still do get those moments..those moments of groping at the world with only feelings...and then some practical reality slaps us in the face and brings us back into our overprocessed overthinking ways.
Thanks for sharing, JWOWW.

There was this artist once, decades ago, with whom I got very, very drunk at a club called Tracks. Outside, in his car, in the middle of sliding into fourth, I suddenly leapt out of the passenger-side door retching all over the ground. Heaving and spewing drink after dirty drink for what seemed an eternity. I remember thinking, "Wow, I am really losing it here. I've finally crossed the line. I keep feeling blinded by white light. I think I may be actually dying!"

... then I realized... the ar-tiste was kneeling on the ground in front of me snapping close-ups of me throwing up. The blinding flashing lights came from the flash on his camera.

I heard later than he intended the pictures to be part of some gallery show. I don't know if they ever were, or if I was recognizable, or if they'll ever pop up in my future, and I don't care because, honestly, it's who I was then.

Fuuuuuucking hell, I've just stumbled across this site and I'm amazed I've never heard of you before. Your last paragraph here so perfectly sums up my hazy recollection of 'youth' (not that it's over, hopefully!)

I've currently got less than £20 in the bank, but I think I'll have to buy one of your books soon. Real headfuck.


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